Echoes in my heart
by Alisaru
Summary: Chapter 7 out! As people of Konoha struggle against the invasion of the Sound village, Iruka and Kakashi's friendship is growing into something more... KakaIru shounenai, with some explicit content. PS This is my first story... ever! Hope you like it!
1. Destruction

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the mentioned characters or places.

**Warning:** A hint of Kaka-Iru. No like? No read.

_Here is the first chapter of my first fanfic. The story is taking place just after the chuunin exam, however it might not exactly reflect the manga series… Oh well, hopefully it works anyway! Enjoy and review please :)  
_

**Summary:** Aftermath of invasion by the Sound village…

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Hard times were on the village again. Most of the center of Konoha was ravaged in the fight between the Sound nin and the Konoha defenders, roofs ripped out from the houses in explosions, windows and walls shredded by shuriken and splattered with blood stains. It was a massacre of a battle, but at least now the village was safe. And the price of its safety was death of many jounin and chuunin, and the greatest loss of all - the 3rd Hokage.

Iruka-san was walking down the street towards the city hall bearing an arm-full of report scrolls. Seeing so much death and destruction was putting nails through his heart. This village was more than just a place where he grew up. After the loss of his parents his life has become a lonely place, and only the support and love of Konoha's people brought him out again and made him feel like a part of something bigger. Konoha is his hamily, and Hokage is... was... almost like a father. Iruka squeesed his eyes shut, to keep the burning tears within.

"Iruka-sensei!!" a shout brought him to a stop. He turned around. "Ohayo, Naruto-kun, Sakura-chan!"

"Ohayo Iruka-sensei," blushed the girl. She was carrying a bunch of cloth, probably to be used for bandages.

"Iruka-sensei, we are helping to restore the village!" the blond boy enthusiastically exclaimed. "Watch this!" quickly forming the seals with his hands he shouted "Kage bunshin no jutsu!" and BANG there were now ten Naruto standing around Iruka. Immediately they rushed to the rubble on the street and energetically started to clear it out. One of the village women jumped with a yelp at seeing the replication and dropped the bag she was carrying.

"You idiot!" roared Sakura and walloped the nearest Naruto on the head. Iruka chuckled, looks like things were returning to normal.

This was just one of the things that Iruka loved about Konoha. No matter what trouble happened, the villagers would always stand up, shake the dirt and pain off and build a better life.

"Iruka-sensei, have you seen Kakashi-sensei? We haven't seen him after the end of the fight..." said Sakura. This has brought another pang of pain to Iruka's heart. Iruka and Kakashi have knows each other for a few years but have only started to communicate a year or so ago. As well as teaching, Iruka worked at the mission center, handling the reports. Being quite shy and withdrawn when not with his young subordinates, he tended to keep to himself and do this job quietly. One time, when checking over a Rank-D mission report from one of the jounin, he noticed some doodles in the margin. Looking closer he realised that doodles actually illustrated the mission report and quite comically described the way the jounin's team handled a search for a missing cat. The comical illustrations made Iruka laugh out loud, causing other nin in the room to stop and look at him. Iruka blushed furiously and glanced at the jounin who appeared to be chuckling behind his mask. The doodling jounin was Kakashi, and from that day he made a point of putting something in his reports to make Iruka react.

This has started a strange kind of friendship between the two nin. Occasionally they would get together for a bowl of Ichiraku's ramen, or just sit on some high roof watching the sun setting into the endless forest around the village. Iruka would laugh about his students who could be little devils and would make his day a nightmare given half a chance, and Kakashi would talk about his own three troublesome genin.

"Sasuke's situation is going to get him grief in the future," Kakashi was saying. "He just can't let go. He can't or he won't, either way its not going to end well. There is more to life than revenge, if only he would see that." Iruka was surprised and warmed to find out that Kakashi was so insightful and caring about his students. Kakashi's students for some reason always ended up in some kind of mess (like that time with the poisonous bush... or the mud incident... or those insects) which always made Iruka flare up and rant his usual lecture on responsibility etc. at which Kakashi always laughed and said that he is entitled to some fun too. Also, he claimed, it would make them stronger and better ninjas. The idea of Kakashi finding his underling's troubles entertaining was disturbing Iruka's sensei sensibilities, except that he knew that it was just a front.

Its at those times that Iruka noticed that his feelings towards Kakashi have changed into something more. Every time they would meet, Iruka felt warm and comforted by his friend's presence, and when Kakashi was away on his missions Iruka felt that there was something missing from his life. This feeling has disturbed him, so he tried to put it away, lock it inside his heart, but the more he pushed it away, the more it hurt. He was sure that Kakashi did not return his feelings and at any rate was too horrified at the idea of Kakashi's potential disgust to ever try and find out. So that's how it was until now...

As the village invasion broke out, everything was happenning in the mad rush. Every ninja knew what to do in case of invasion, so as soon as the signal was given, together with other chuunin Iruka was busy rounding up the kids from the academy and getting them to the designated shelters. Thankfully they managed to get to safety without encountering the enemy nin. Throughout the entire invasion Iruka was busy organising the escape, supervising the youngsters and keeping them calm, and only after things have calmed down it hit him. Kakashi could be dead. He could be dying right now. Even being one of the best ninjas in the village, he could have been overwhelmed, tricked... Iruka choked at the thought, images of the lifeless masked figure lying in a pool of blood flashing through his brain made him stagger...

"Iruka-sensei?" Sakura's voice broke through the memories in Iruka's mind. He shook his head to clear it. 'Calm down, all's well now, calm...'

"Are... you... are you ok?" Sakura's face was looking up worriedly at her sensei paled face. "I am fine Sakura, thank you for asking", he replied with a smile. "I haven't seen Kakashi-sensei yet either, but I am sure he is well. In fact, I am on my way to the mission centre now, and when I see him I'll be sure to tell him that you guys are worried!"

"Arigatou, Iruka-sensei!" beamed Sakura and rushed off to help Naruto.

His heart pounding against his chest, Iruka quickened his steps to the mission centre...


	2. Revival

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the mentioned characters or places.

**Warning:** Blatant Kaka-Iru. A smutty scene in the bathroom! No like? No read!

_Editing this chapter to smooth out the last few paragraphs. Thank you very much for the kind reviews, it makes me feel very fuzzy thinking that people actually read this XD_

**Summary:** Iruka's naughty thoughts… and actions!

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Iruka burst into the reporting room, filled with glow from the afternoon sun. Most of the ninjas were there already, on time for the re-coup meeting. Quickly eyeing around the room, Iruka did not spot the familiar shock of silver hair anywhere. Approaching a long desk at the end of the room, Iruka emptied his hands of the scrolls.

"Ohayo, Iruka-san", said Azuma, fuming away with his cigarette. "Did everything went well with the evacuation? I believe that we managed to intercept most of those bastards before they got anywhere near the caves. Did you get any trouble?" Iruka liked the bearded jounin who often shown interest in his work. It always made him wonder how the nin managed to stay hidden whilst apparently always puffing at that stick. He must be a real concealment genius!

"Ohayo Azuma-san," bowed Iruka. "Thanks to you guys we haven't had any trouble at all. There was a certain amount of damage done to the south side of the village, but there were hardly any casualties. I have the reports here." Azuma frowned looking over the scroll. "I'm afraid we were not so lucky..." Azuma grumbled.

"Azuma-san...", Iruka hesitated. 'I must know. He's not here. Is he...' "Azuma-san, do you know if Ka..."

"Ohayo!" A familiar voice chimed from the doorway. Iruka spun around nearly loosing his footing. Kakashi was leaning at the door frame, waving a greeting to the room with one hand. Relief like never felt before has flooded Iruka. Tears filling up his eyes, unthinkingly he stepped towards Kakashi... Kakashi's masked face moving closer... A look of surprise in Kakashi's one eye made Iruka snap out and realise that he has just crossed the room pushing past all the nin to get to Kakashi! An embarrassment set Iruka's cheeks aflame. He bowed his head down, touched the scar on his face and tried to squeeze past Kakashi.

A gloved hand barred his way. Iruka raised his still red face and found himself staring right at the Kakashi's intense eye. Masked face leaned closer, to the side of Iruka's face. "Iruka-kun... I'm glad to see you well. Let us meet at Ichiraku's at sunset." The hand holding Iruka still was gone and he nearly tumbled through the doorway.

In a daze, Iruka left the building and wondered through the streets of Konoha. Surges in his emotions - from fear to relief, from embarrassment to happiness have made him feel exhausted. He stopped in front of the warehouse. The roof has been blasted through, the inside was full of rubble and people were trying to clear it away. Looking at the sun, Iruka estimated that he had about 2 hours before the sunset. Pulling up his sleeves above the elbows he stepped into the warehouse to the friendly cheers and began helping the people with their work.

An hour later, when the rubble got cleared out and separated into piles, an old lady came up to Iruka. "Maa, Iruka-kun, you were always such a helpful child" she crooned, smiling gratefully and trying to pat him on the head though not quite reaching him. "Thank you so much, now go have a wash, there's a good lad!" Iruka laughed and hugged okaa-san, and with a glance at the sun rushed off towards his apartment. Doing physical work out in fresh air (roofless warehouse could count as "out") had always made him forget his troubles and made him feel refreshed.

Getting into his flat, Iruka threw off his clothes. Jumping in a shower, puffing at the cool water and vigorously washing himself, he thought about his upcoming meeting with Kakashi. Last time he saw him was when they both shared a quiet evening at the water tower, two days ago. In two days time, the war made the world seem like a different place. A place where loved ones can be taken from you at any time. Iruka blushed at that though and stuck his face under the stream of water. When possibility of loss becomes a reality, feelings take their true shape and become strong like katana steel. Could Kakashi feel the same way? Did he?

Iruka pulled off the thong holding his hair back and let water soak his brown tresses. Hanging down, they reached just lower than his shoulders. Iruka wondered if Kakashi hair stayed in its peculiar shape when he was sleeping. Was he wearing his mask in bed too? He imagined Kakashi sprawled across a bed, his pale muscled body gleaming in the moonlight, and blushed. This image gave him a warm... burning feeling in his stomach. 'It's not right', thought Iruka. 'I shouldn't... he probably isn't...' But his imagination was wondering away uncontrollably now.

With his eyes closed, Iruka could see Kakashi standing behind him, looking at him, not a stitch on his lean body. He imagined mist of the spraying water settling on the creamy chest, smooth skin glistening… glowing… Iruka felt himself getting aroused. He squeezed his eyes shut and groaned quietly, water running down his face not able to cool him.

He imagined the taller man stepping closer, toned muscles performing a slow dance under his skin. He imagined the droplets of water hesitantly running down Kakashi's back, tracing the ripples of hard pale flesh. Next, it wasn't the droplets, it was Iruka's fingers shadowing down the taller man's back. Iruka's hand has moved down to his own hardened member of its own volition. In his mind, Kakashi was right behind him, he could almost feel the tingling heat coming of the pale man's body on his skin. He started to stroke himself.

He imagined Kakashi leaning closer... like he did earlier in the doorway... his mask was gone... thin lips were nearly brushing the younger man's cheek... He could almost feel the hot breath on his neck... He was tugging at himself fast now, unable to control his movements, unable to stifle his moans. He imagined those lips, without the mask... opening up... the wave of pleasure inside him rising up... he felt those lips touching his neck, burning him, and he felt himself explode with ecstasy pulsing out of him... Unable to silence himself he shouted out, knees buckling… And Iruka found himself shuddering on the floor of his shower cubicle, panting and... alone.

Cursing, which was very unlike him, he rushed out of the shower. Towelling himself dry he went into the bedroom and to the wardrobe, taking out a fresh change of clothing. Black netted vest, dark-blue shirt which he left unbuttoned and light-blue jeans. Hurriedly combing his hair he looked out of the window - the sun was setting. He run to the door thinking 'I'm going to be late. What am I going to tell him? I was late because... I was fantasizing about you in a shower?' He chuckled. 'If it's like that when I'm only imagining him, what would it be like...'


	3. At Ichiraku's

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the mentioned characters or places.

**Warning:** KakaIru, sap and angst. No like? No read!

_Big thanks to all the people who have reviewed my story so far! I hope that you enjoy reading this chapter as much as I've enjoyed writing it. In the edit, I've tried to get rid of most of the cliché's. Not sure I succeeded though, I like them too much! Blush…_

**Summary:** Kakashi's feelings revealed... But is that what he really feels?

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Kakashi was sitting on a stool at the Ichiraku's, chatting pleasantly with the proprietor. Jumping off the neighbouring house rooftop, Iruka has landed on the street in a small pull of dust, making the proprietor jump with surprise. "You're late, Iruka-sensei," Kakashi intoned, his one visible eye a smiling crescent. "Normally it's my job. Are you planning on ruining my reputation?" "Gomen," apologised panting Iruka. "However I doubt a small thing as me being later than you could do anything to your reputation!" He grinned mischievously. "How is the story that you're reading? Is that it, lying under your elbow?" He pointed to the red book which Kakashi was trying to cover with his arm.

"Oh, there is a delightful twist in the plot," Kakashi's eyes were twinkling with mirth. "However, my dear friend, what would send you running in such frenzy? And with your hair wet?" Kakashi leaned forward, reaching to Iruka and brushing a wet strand of hair that has come loose. Iruka's face instantly flushed up. "I... um... eh... Oh! Shouldn't we order some ramen? I'm starving!" Iruka, happy at finding a distraction started waving at the confused looking proprietor. "Miso ramen!"

"Make that two", added Kakashi, looking at his friend from the corner of his eye.

Kakashi was exhausted. The recent re-appearance of Orochimaru was worrying enough, but it made him feel angry that nobody (himself included) managed to connect the dots and see the upcoming invasion. He only felt slight relief that the late Hokage, may his spirit find peace and harmony, has put in place the measures which have prevented so many casualties. The fighting was tough. Although none of his opponents gave him much of a challenge, the sheer number of foes put a constant drain on his chakra. Currently he was feeling like he let Naruto-kun and a 100 of his bunshin trample him for a day.

Seeing Iruka in the meeting room has raised in him a strange feeling of warmness. He attributed it to the relief that his friend has gone through the day unscathed. Kakashi was weary of this feeling of attachment. From his past he was very much familiar with the pain and suffering brought by the death of loved ones. Hardened by years of silent misery, he has decided not to let anyone else close to his heart. That's why he did not have any close friends; he was a loner and that's the way he liked it. If anything, death was the thing that he courted.

Iruka however… Iruka was a gentle, sincere person. Growing up virtually on his own seems to have taught Iruka kindness and understanding of the kids. Kakashi was glad that Iruka has decided to stay a chuunin and become a teacher. The ordeals through which ninjas went through to deserve the title of jounin would have undoubtedly soiled his heart and turned him into yet another shell of suffering, full of hidden monsters. This village has too many of them already.

Looking at Iruka's face, he noticed the circles under his eyes. "Did the younglings give you much trouble, Iruka-sensei?" he enquired. Then, trying to make Iruka smile: "I heard that you have handled them very well. I'm quite relieved myself for not having to keep them in check, fighting back enemy ninjas seems a much easier job!"

Iruka laughed "Oh they are not that bad, really. Nothing a firm hand and a set of eyes at the back of your head can't handle!"

The ramen has arrived. "Itadakimasu!" friends have reached for the chopsticks.

"Actually they were very brave," continued Iruka, going enthusiastically for his noodle. "And for once seemed to be doing what they were told" he chuckled. Then his face darkened. "We could see the fighting at the stadium. I felt the chakra emanating from there, it must have been bad. You were there, ne? " He turned to look at Kakashi… and froze. Kakashi's bowl was empty, and the man himself was leaning back contentedly, correcting the mask on his face. 'Wow, that was fast!' Iruka gaped. It never ceased to amaze him how Kakashi always managed to eat so quickly. One day he's going to choke, Iruka bet.

"Between me and Gai, we had ourselves a bit a fun" grinned Kakashi. "And is seems that the fun is not going to stop. A few of those Sound bastards were spotted loitering in the forest near the West gate. After a small break, Kurenai and I will be heading out to see what we can do. Actually I had better be heading back to mine to catch up on some sleep." Standing up, he faced Iruka and frowned at the look of worry flooding his friend's face. "Maa, don't worry, Iruka, they are not a big threat. Tonight we'll make them wish they never even learned to spell Konoha!" Kakashi flashed Gai-style grin (hampered by the mask) and stuck out his thumb.

"It's not that… I mean not just that…" Iruka stuttered looking downwards, his hand flying up to the scar on his face. Together they walked down the street. Kakashi was worried. He has never seen his friend disturbed so. He suspected that Iruka did not have that much first-hand combat experience. Seeing all the death and violence today must have affected him more than he let on. Prospect of death did not bother Kakashi, as long as it happened whilst protecting his village or his comrades.

Walking in silence through the darkening streets, his hands stuffed in his pockets, Kakashi thought about his friend. He has seen him around for years but never really paid attention to the quiet chuunin until that day in the reporting room when he heard him laugh. The sound of laughter was pure, happy, untainted by suffering - something that Kakashi has not heard in a very long time. He remembered looking down at Iruka who was holding his report. Leaning closer he saw his mindless doodles of his troublesome gennin team and nearly thumped himself on the head. But seeing the glow of embarrassment on the young chuunin's face gave him a cheeky desire to see it again.

Looking down at the young man walking next to him, his ponytail hanging down his tanned neck, he realised that he has become very fond of his friend. The thought of unhappy Iruka was almost painful, so he put an arm around his friend's shoulders in a comforting hug. "Hey, Iruka-kun" he intoned, "bad times like these come and go, but you know that I won't let anything happen to you." Feeling Iruka shiver under his arm, he squeezed him closer. Intently he said "I will protect you with my life."

Iruka's heart was pounding in his chest. It was too much. That damned Kakashi… He was looking forward to the next battle like it was a game! Maybe it was for him. The famous Copy Ninja, he had no fear of death, he enjoyed having his strength and knowledge tested in combat. He though that at the end of the day it was just one life. He never even realised that the person who he is holding in his arm right now has already given Kakashi his heart! If one heart would stop, the other will break too.

Iruka shuddered a breath. The feeling of a warm heavy arm around his shoulders was sapping out his reserves. In just a few minutes his friend would leave him, and there will be nothing left but growing emptiness and dark cold streets. He wished this moment of togetherness would last forever. He wished he could say something to Kakashi, to make him see that he is important to him, to make him stay (what a selfish though!) but the words stuck in his throat. This was not Kakashi's way. He would only push him away.

They have finally reached Iruka's door. The arm has lifted from his shoulders. Iruka froze with his head hanging down. He could not make himself lift his head and look into the beloved face, afraid what Kakashi could see... Suddenly two gloved hands took his face and raised it to look straight into Kakashi's one intense eye. Concern was filling it, and…

"Iruka…" Kakashi was looking down into the big dark eyes aglow with the light of the full moon. The depth of those eyes seemed to swallow the world. Like windows into Iruka's soul, Kakashi could not believe what he was seeing. There was loneliness, longing, swirling in pools of suppressed emotion… and something else that Kakashi could not think of a word for.

Confusion filled Kakashi's head. Like under some terrible genjutsu, he felt his insides twist, wrecking havoc in his inner world. All the beloved faces were rising up from his memories, faces now dead and rotting in the ground, they were all looking at him from those eyes. His carefully built up walls were crumbling. He gasped, struggling to take control over himself.

Kakashi's staring eye was growing wider and wider. A fear surged through him, a fear of loss. Overwhelmed, he pushed Iruka away, jumped back and disappeared. With a gasp, Iruka crashed against the door of his flat.

Running over the roofs, Kakashi didn't know where he was going. Conflicting thoughts and feelings were running though him. 'I'm running away…. I never run away!' He ground his teeth. 'Why would he do that to me!' Outrage. 'Have I not suffered enough pain??' Frustration. 'He didn't do anything… Its me. Why did I let him??' Misery. 'I don't deserve it… Him…' Anger. 'I am so naieve!' Darkness.

Light gives darkness shape and meaning. 'I am darkness... I have been the darkness for a long time.' Resolution has settled onto Kakashi's face. He was heading to the West gate.

'Iruka is the light'.


	4. Atonement

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the mentioned characters or places.

**Warning:** This chapter contains disturbing themes, not suitable for easily-influenced audience. Also, do not do this at home, dur:p

_Thank you to all the fans who have reviewed the story so far! Sorry for keeping this chapter from you for so long. Hope it was worth the effort though! Not much action in this one, just a lot of thoughts. But building up to much excitement in the next chapter... Enjoy!_

**Summary:** Iruka's dark side.

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It was the second longest night in Iruka's memory. The first night was the night when his parents got killed. He didn't want to think about that... Iruka felt himself balancing on a precarious edge between misery and anger. He was well familiar with this battle; he often fought it at nights so that next day, victorious, he would emerge strong and bright, and be able to take on the world.

But first... What is the recipe for healing? Dashi of self-blame. A generous portion of stupidity, a sprinkle of diced and sliced self-disappointment. Let is simmer for a bit, then add a delectabe drizzle of shame and finally for the centrepiece - a good chunk of sweet pain. What an idiot was he! Viciously, he dug his head back into the mattress and endured the stab of pain that pierced his skull. Already he was developing a lump on the back of his head where he slammed into the door.

He deserved it! It was his own damn fault. He had everything he needed - a place that he could call home, not just some place but an entire village. He had dozens of children whom he loved and cared for with all of his heart. He helped and was there for anyone that needed him, which gave him an amazing sense of belonging. And in addition, he had a friend, a person with whom he felt comfortable and fulfilled. Growing up without a family, relying on charity of others and undoubtedly being a bother, how dared he to want more, instead of just being grateful for what he had? And to think that earlier he indulged in his misguided feelings in the most vulgar manner...

There are different ways of affirming yourself. You can affirm yourself through love of others. That's how Iruka lived his life on most days. His seemingly endless reserves of patience and tolerance created an aura of peace and stability around himself. Perhaps that's what made him such a good teacher... But his reserves only worked for others, not for himself. At times like these (which were pretty rare), to reaffirm his existence he needed pain.

Iruka was disgusted with himself. So presumptuous, he put his friend into situation that made him feel bad enough to push Iruka away. What was it that he saw in Kakashi's eyes? Surprise... definitely confusion... was there disgust? Iruka thought he could remember disgust in his friend's eyes. Like an experienced medic-nin, Iruka analysed his emotional state. The poison was there, like a snake it was coiled into a spring ready to snap and wreck havoc in his inner self. He knew what he had to do next.

Iruka got up from his bed and went to the kitchen. If anyone would have seen him at this moment, they wouldn't recognise him. An unfamiliar tension disfigured Iruka's face. Hunched and stiff, he looked older. Physical injuries can heal and be gone. How do you get rid of your emotional pain? It's so logical, you simply turn it into something you can see and put bandages on. Roughly pulling kitchen draw open, he grabbed his chopping knife. 'I need to do this', he though. 'It has to be done.'

Iruka's eyes stared into the darkness outside. As from a distance, he felt the coldness against his taught stomach skin. Further and further he seemed to fall away from himself. Like a cold icicle he felt the blade slide, slowly, against his skin. The sharp coldness was intensifying, turning into burning frost. 'Heeon...' line after burning line was placed on the taught skin, drawing a symbol for redemption.

………………………………………………………………………..

The long dark night was over.

Bright crisp light was slowly filling the bedroom as the sun rose. Iruka leaped from bed, feeling full of energy, ready to meet the day. Making up breakfast, he thought about the day ahead. There will not be any classes for the next few days at least. All of the available hands would be put to restoring the village into a decent state. Smiling to himself, Iruka thought of the cheers he'll be hearing from his young student when he'll tell them about the cancelled classes. And then of the groans when they hear about having to work anyway.

As Iruka was getting dressed he contemplated what he's done last night. He felt vaguely ashamed about his actions because it was an obvious weakness. What kind of shinobi would hurt himself to stop hurting? It even sounded kind of stupid. But then again, in his experience, most high-level shinobi were a bit strange and twisted in their own way. For all he knew, this was a normal course of things. Happy stable people had families that supported them and kept them that way. He didn't have a family, but in his own way he managed to stay happy and stable, the only way he knew how.

In a sudden moment of clarity, Iruka realised that people are not designed to exist as lone individuals. All the good and worthy things, like harmony and love, came from companionship, and loneliness only brought misery and emptiness. Being a shinobi (or being in love with one) the foremost feeling is always going to be the fear of loss of other, but only a coward would shy away, because love is worth pain. In spite of everything, Iruka knew that love was worth dying for.

Even if Kakashi didn't return his feelings, which was obvious to Iruka, he has already accepted that fact with good grace. As for his unrequited love, he would treasure it and keep it locked in his heart, because that's all he now could do.

Grabbing his bento box, Iruka left his flat and locked the door. Setting off at a brisk walk towards the academy, he deeply breathed in the chilly morning air. Already filling up with cooking smells, gentle breeze carried intoxicating perfumes of summer, dust knocked out of it by the night mist. It was the smell of home and comfort and life.

Unlocking the academy's front door, Iruka anticipated a few quiet minutes to sort out the schedule for the day ahead before the arrival of his sleepy charges, however his plans were abruptly changed. Sensing another's chakra, Iruka turned around to find himself face to face with a rather roughed-up looking Kurenai. The jounin was covered with mud (or blood?) and her usually immaculate clothes were decorated with an impressive variety of gashes. Gingerly she was supporting her very purple looking shoulder. She also sported an ugly slash on her right her cheek and dried blood formed a scaly track down her neck.

"Konichiwa, Iruka-sensei!" said the jounin. "I'm glad I caught you before the start of classes."

"Ohayo, Kurenai-san" said Iruka. Then, disturbed by her appearance "What happened? You look like you should be in hospital, let me..."

"Don't trouble yourself, touto-kun," smiled Kurenai, dried blood flaking off her cheek. "I'm on my way there now. It's nothing serious. Me and Kakashi-san have run into some trouble last night." She grinned viciously, red eyes sparkling. "The strange thing though, Kakashi-san was early for once. When I arrived, he has already rather violently disposed of four Sound scouts, and was sniffing out the next pack. Honestly can't recall the last time I've seen him so bloodthirsty. Its like he was laying out personal revenge." Kurenai turned her head towards the west city wall.

"He was actually really cute... in a sadistic sort of way" She chuckled, peeking at Iruka who choked, and attempted to mascarade it with a cough. That woman! Kurenai has always treated Iruka as her younger brother, but even though Iruka was used to her cheekiness, her tastes still made him blush. He was quite impressed with Asuma's ability to put up with her.

"But what am I thinking! I'm here to let you know of the new orders from the council." Suddenly getting serious, she proceeded to explain them to Iruka.

It appears that as her and Kakashi were finishing their patrol, a messenger has arrived from the council. There have been ongoing negotiations with the Sand village to arrange a peace treaty. Since Kakashi was the strongest and most able shinobi within a day's reach at the moment, he was given the task of delivering the documents to the Sound leaders.

"The courier has intercepted us on our way in" said Kurenai, leaning on the door frame. "So by now Kakashi-san would be well on his way. Meanwhile, all the available chuunin with combat experience of three or more B missions have to report to the council. Looks like you'll be re-joining our ranks for the reconnaissance missions." Kurenai paused. "You know, I never knew that you've done an A-rank mission. And eight of them?? I guess it's true what they say, its always the quiet ones!" Grinning, Kurenai straightened up and clasped Iruka's shoulder with her good hand. "Nice to have you with us again, otouto-san."

"Arigatou" Iruka squeezed Kurenai's hand in return. "I'd better get ready then."

As she started walking, she turned around "Almost forgot! Before Kakashi-san departed, he wrote a quick note and asked me to pass it to you." Taking out a folded crumpled piece of paper from her pocket, she passed it to Iruka with a wink. "Hey, is there anything you want to tell me?" Just as affronted Iruka started to open his mouth, she laughed and leapt away.

Bringing the folded square of paper closer to his eyes, Iruka realised that he was looking at a page of Icha Icha. The note must contain something really important if Kakashi was willing to deface his favourite book and use it as scrap paper. Iruka paused for a second, mulling over that thought. Slowly he started unfolding the page, trying to not to stare at the graphic illustrations.

"Konichiwaaaaaa! Iruka-senseeeeeeiiii!!" The second he heard the shout coming from the quickly approaching hyper horde of Konohamaru & Co, Iruka crumpled the note in his fist. 'I guess I'll have to read it later'.

Iruka followed the noisy bunch into the academy building. In front of the classroom door, kids stopped "Come in Iruka-sensei! After you, Iruka-sensei!" With the note occupying his mind, Iruka missed all the signals and howling alarms going off in his head. Opening the door he took a step into the room.

As hit foot hit the floor, he felt his balance suddenly shift and the next second he was flying in a spin. Finally, ninja-sensei instincts have kicked in. Iruka twisted and with his hands caught himself before hitting the floor (which was covered with bouncing marbles). Pushing away, he landed gracefully on his feet a meter away. "Now," he growled. "What do you think..." Sixth sense made him duck his head as a chalk-rubber whistled past his head. Throwing his hands together, he performed a short-distance teleportation jutsu and was presently surveying the troublesome trio from the back of the classroom, his arms folded accross his chest. The unlikely projectile has finished its trajectory in a vase which was now in pieces on the floor in a quickly growing puddle. It looks like the kids have set up a few traps the day before, ready for his arrival this morning. Chuckling inside, Iruka remembered the saying about idle hands making their own work. Well, that can be fixed easy enough.

Konohamaru was rolling on the floor with laughter. Udon was standing in the doorway, his jaw hanging down in amazement. "Wooooooow, Iruka-sensei, you were amazing!" Moegi-chan was squeezing her hands together anxiously, squeaking "Gomen nasai!! I told them not to do it but they wouldn't listen!"

Iruka wasn't fooled. Putting on his most fearsome expression, he boomed "So, you think you are now good enough to challenge your sensei!" Walking down between the desks, he continued "Well, you are going to have to demonstrate your amazing ninja skills by first cleaning up the classroom!" Suitably quickly, the laughter was replaced with a disappointed grumbling.

Suddenly, Iruka noticed something on the floor, lying in the puddle of water. The note! He must have dropped it whilst trying to avoid cracking his head. Picking up the sodden piece of paper, aghast Iruka unfolded it. The words were already unrecognisable, red ink was spreading uncontrollably.

Red ink? Iruka froze. Where would Kakashi get red ink from in the middle of a mission? It was not ink, Kakashi was writing with his own blood!

* * *

_A/N_

_Dashi is Japanese stock made from cooking fish and/or sea vegetables. A base ingredient of many soups and ramen._

_Heeon(kanji) means inner peace, freedom from anxiety_


	5. Reality lost

**Disclaimer**: I do not own any of the mentioned characters or places.

**Warning**: This chapter contains elephants! If you don't like elephants (or KakaIru), please skip this chapter.

_Thank you guys for your kind reviews! I've been thinking about writing an action chapter for ages now, but the building-up-to-it bit keeps growing… Gah, it will be worth it in the end, I promise! Edit: trying to improve the flow._

**Summary**: Few days later… Kakashi's on his way back from the critical mission. But will he make it?

* * *

Cold moisture was making the air thick. The drizzle was somewhere between a thick fog and rain, following sporadic gusts of wind. Night sky was completely covered with a thick sheet of cloud, completely obliterating any inkling of starlight. It was the kind of darkness that made you feel like you have gone blind. 

Resisting the urge to check if his hitae-ate was over **both **of his eyes, Kakashi felt the rough surface on which he was leaning. It felt like a tree, it smelled like a tree, but it might as well have been a leg of an elephant with bad skin problem, as far as his eyes was concerned.

Trying not to jolt his damaged leg too much, Kakashi shakily lowered himself to the soggy ground and leant on the trunk. In his head were floating delirious images of laughing leprous elephants... He thought he could even feel the slow heartbeat against his back. He shook his head to try and clear it. A tree, that's right. No elephants in Fire country. Apart from when Jiraya gets in trouble and summons one. No, that's the frog boss... The elephant cackled and the waves of wheezing dry sound made Kakashi sway with dizziness.

A distant part of him knew that he was hallucinating. From some other perspective, Kakashi could see himself sprawled between the tree roots, one leg splinted and bandaged with bloody and dirty strips of cloth, green combat vest shredded with countless slashes, some superficial and some lined with blood. More importantly, he only had a minimum of chakra left, just enough to stand up and keep walking. Well, he hoped it was enough. 'In a few more minutes...'

He wished he didn't ditch his bag yesterday. It still had some salve left in it, the rations and the pills, although if he was to take another one now, he'd probably be able to get to that other eleph... the tree over there before dropping dead. Which would be bad. Why? The elephant shook his head disapprovingly, its trunk swing wide like a limp flaking snake. Kakashi felt queasy. That's right! The scroll...

Raising his hand to his chest, Kakashi rested it on the bulge on his vest. The salvation of Konoha village... Three days ago Kakashi has finally made it to the hidden Sand village, met with the village council and passed on the request of alliance. The request was accepted, preliminary treaty was signed and the agreement that would provide Konoha with much needed support was now getting soggy in Kakashi's chest pocket.

His mask was stiff with blood that gushed from his nose after the fight few hours back. Pulling it down, Kakashi lifted his head to the invisible sky and breathed in the heavy air. He felt cold and numb. (Dehydration, nodded the elephant, together with lack of food and sleep, chakra exhaustion and infection in the wounds.) Almost from the start he was pursued by the teams of Sound nin who seemed to be desperate to hinder him. Desperate because they knew that if alliance was set between Konoha and Sand then their efforts at invasion and all the deaths would have been in vain. For that exact reason Kakashi was dead set on not letting anything stop him.

It wasn't too bad at the start. He was still angry then, and re-channelling his anger into the fights has turned them into something just short of slaughter. If he managed to leave anyone alive, this would surely give his reputation a fearsome boost. But by the next day his anger has run out and the tiredness from the previous day's fighting started to catch up. Being in constant pursuit by the Sound nin, he couldn't afford to stop for more than an hour here and there before continuing on his mad flight. They did catch up on the third day, and that fight was too close to defeat for Kakashi's comfort. His head was still ringing.

Cold and damp made Kakashi's bare face feel solid and stiff. (You can't take off your mask even when you pull that cloth from your face, elephant jeered, do you even remember your own face?) Yes. It was his father's face, Kakashi grimaced. Leaning on the leg of the putrid elephant Kakashi thought that this place has truly reflected him. Endless darkness populated by monsters, with and without masks.

Cold wind blew through the darkness, swaying the world. Like a tiny burn, Kakashi felt a rain-drop land on his bare face, and then another. Sitting above him on the elephant's rump, feet dangling, was a shape of a man. His eyes were pools of shadowy gold radiating endless sadness. Another drop has left the pool and floated down to land on Kakashi's face.

"Don't cry, silly dolphin" mumbled Kakashi. 'You know I didn't mean to hurt you... I would never hurt you. Never again.' Drop. Iruka's presence was constant at the back of his mind during this last mission.

'Serves you right though. You come into my life… offer all the answers… how dare you try and take away my precious pain!' Drop.

'I will die… Or worse, you will die. And then what?' The hunched shaped sat still, silence only disturbed by the sound of tear/rain drops. 'You're shinobi… master tactician… should know better than stabbing yourself in the back.' Languid air was getting hard to force into his lungs.

'Wouldn't you rather… just live alone?' He was trying to persuade himself. 'We have our duty… and when we die, why make our precious ones suffer... Right? Nobody likes the drama.' Drop.

Kakashi thought back to Iruka's wide sorrowful eyes… 'With just one look… you made me see that my life is a job that I do… for a while now. And all these other people whom I protect... Who are they? I am but another wall… between them and the destruction… and when I'll go down someone else will take my place." Drop. Elephant shifted his weight and Kakashi stiffened trying to keep the world from spinning.

'You made me see it… I can only go that extra step if my heart is… in what I'm trying to protect.'

'Keep my heart safe for me, Iruka… Hold it tight, and I'll be the best shinobi that I can be - for you…' The figure of a man was walking away, distance quickly growing in an unrealistic fashion.

"Matte… Don't leave, Iruka… The note… I meant it." Kakashi burst into harsh cough and winced at the metallic taste. Catching cold now would not be clever.

With groan Kakashi heaved himself onto his feet away from cold soggy ground. 'Enough of this craziness' he told himself. 'Remember the mission. Not far left to go to the border… but the road won't be safe… or easy.' One good thing about having almost no chakra – it made it almost impossible for enemies to detect you in this grim forest. Concentrating the feeble reserves of chakra in his eye, the darkness around Kakashi has slowly resolved itself into dripping jungle full of soggy undergrowth.

One wobbly step after another, Kakashi hobbled onwards.

In his mind he saw Iruka's eyes looking at him, hazy pools of swirling gold, radiating comfort and warmness. 'You are the stronger one… because, in spite of everything you still are not afraid to smile and love. Indomitable Iruka… I'll give you more reasons to smile.' A pause.

'And I love you.' Kakashi winced at the uncomfortable words. 'Yes, you heard me. I, Konoha-no Hatake Kakashi the one-eyed and soon-to-be-one-legged heartless son-of-a-traitor sadistic shinobi No1. I. Love. You, Iruka-sensei. And I'm coming back to make you mine."

Silently, the hunched figure merged into the darkness.


	6. Reality found

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the mentioned characters or places. However I claim creative rights over the mentioned elephant.

**Warning:** Blood and gore. A hint of yaoi.

_Its finally here! The chapter I was looking forward to witing so much, its all done. I hope everything makes sense because Its getting pretty late here, but it was so much fun writing this one that I just couldn't stop! Also, this chapter is dedicated to Kris who is very nosy and who undoubtely went to great lengths to find out what my fanfiction alias was. And he succeeded too! gasp Well, hope you enjoy this ;) _

**Summary:** Iruka kicks butt. Oh yes he does!

* * *

Crouching on a thick branch in shadows above the camp, Iruka was scrutinising the camp below. Masking of his chakra and the khaki colours of his chuunin gear made him blend in perfectly into the night forest. Below him a tiny fire in the middle of the clearing was giving just enough light to show three ninjas patching up each other's wounds, and the fourth one crouching above the still body of Iruka's comrade.

"We might have been too harsh on him," smirked the cloaked Sound nin crouched by the still body. "Looks like he's a gonner. Is that what they call a ninja in Konoha these days?" The three laughed along.

Iruka ground his teeth. He wasn't fast enough after all. During the unexpected clash between the two hostile teams, four versus two, Iruka got stranded with the enemy ninja whilst the younger chuunin was dragged off by the rest of the infiltrating team. Even with all of his skill it took Iruka good 15 minutes to deal with the enemy. Looking at the spreadeagled body below it seemed that Iruka's partner put up a decent resistance as well... if in vain.

Iruka remembered this kid attending his classes only a few years back, remembered teaching him the shuriken techniques, telling him off for putting snails in another student's lunch, sticking plaster on a grased knee and wiping his tears... Now, his face was staring up at the night sky with glased-over eyes. And to the men down below he was no more than a tool, a piece of meat. Iruka felt a singe of anger.

Thats why he chose not to become a jounin, even after he was asked to by the old hokage. He wanted to stay human.

There still might be a chance that the boy lived. Iruka needed to come back to the village and report about the infiltrators, but no way in hell was he going to leave his comrade if there is even the slimmest chance...

Sliding out three shuriken with one hand and flicking them into flight, Iruka lunged off the branch. A burst of shouts followed him as Sound nin jumped up and hopped into the surrounding trees as to avoid being easy targets. Immediately from the left followed a series of explosions from the tags that Iruka planted in advance. He nodded to the pained muffled yells that came from that direction. That should at least slow one of them down.

Fingers full of the last of his shuriken, Iruka bounded in the direction where the second nin disappeared. Sensing a glimpse of chaka to his left, Iruka flung himself down, narrowly avoiding whistling kunai. Rolling along the ground, Iruka dispatched the shuriken, hopped up and burst into dead run towards his target. He had to move fast to keep any of the advantage he managed to gain so far.

Grabbing kunai in both hands, Iruka lunged at where the sensed the chakra. As he stabbed at the shape, it dissapered into a puff of chakra smoke. A clone! It's a trap! 'Shit' Iruka growled and threw his hands together forming seals for a replacement jutsu. 'Faster, damn it!'

Re-appearing on a branch two meters above, Iruka heard multiple twangs of something sharp as they hit the piece of wood that replaced him. Stilling for a split second, he traced the trajectory and flung himself into a long arch. Twisting in mid-air Iruka summoned Leaf Whirlwind-no jutsu and flung it at the neighbouring tree where the previous attack came from. The tree groaned and spluttered out wood chips from the force that hit it. Iruka saw a shape dashing out of the cover, forming hand-seals.

Landing into a long slide on the muddy ground, Iruka flung one kunai to intercept the moving target. The Sound nin spat blood as the knife hit him in the chest, interrupting his jutsu. A second of relief didn't last long, as the ground suddenly buckled under Iruka's feet. Loosing his footing in the slush, Iruka fell backwards with a smack into the heaving dirt. Movement catching his attention at the last second, he flung his last kunai up. Sparks went flying as one knife screeched in struggle against the other.

"Here, I've got him!" Shouted the ninja as he shifted his weight onto Iruka's chest. Biting his lip, Iruka styfled a yell of pain as he felt his ribs cracking. "And now you die," hissed the man leaning more onto the shaking blades.

"If I am, I'm taking you with me! " Iruka shifted his grip and grabbed the enemy's kunai by the blade. Ignoring the burning in his palm, he heaved with all of his strength, pushing the Sound nin off-balance and making them flip positions. Squeezing his eyes shut, he drove his forehead protector down into the growling enemy's face. Sickening crunch and the force of the hit nearly stunned Iruka. 'Must... keep... moving...' shaking his head trying to clear the fog, Iruka attempted to crawl away from the still body.

"You bastard!" A force of the kick in his belly almost lifted Iruka onto into the air. Instinctively he rolled and hopped up unsteadily onto his feet, struggling to take a breath. Noticing the whistling sound a second too late, Iruka gasped as two shuriken burried themselves into his left bisceps and right shoulder, third one grazing his brow just under the forehead protector. Staggering back, Iruka noticed the second nin readying another handful of shuriken.

"Save them, I'll take care of him!" spoke the cloaked ninja rising up from the still Sound nin's body. "Good thing that you didn't kill my brother. Otherwise I'd have to stop playing nice." Iruka realised that he needed to come up with something fast if he was going to survive this. Thinking back to the first explosions he tried to remember how many there were. If any of the tags were left, maybe he could lure...

Glaring up at Iruka, cloaked nin started forming the seals. Iruka hesitated, not knowing what kind of attack to expect. He couldn't push his body too hard with the damage he has taked already...

"Air element - Thunder clap" shouted the ninga, forcefully bringing his hands together. Iruka saw the quickly approaching wave of distortion and dived to the side. He needed to put something between himself and the wave or he's going get minced. Barely managing to get away from the wave front, Iruka hit the tree trunk, driving the shuriken in his shoulder deeper in. Almost blinded with pain, Iruka leavered himself into his feet before sensing the second wave approaching.

There was no way he could avoid it. Throwing his arms infront of him, Iruka braced. Like a hammer blow, the destructive vibration hit his body jarring every muscle and bone. His ears filled with thousands of burning needles, his head was going to explode... The end.

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The silence was slowly filling up with ringing. Iruka pried his eyes open and looked up at hazy wavering trees all around him. He thought he could see little stars spinning around in a circle above him. 'Wow', he though. 'Its been a while since I saw starry night sky...' Then the picture in front of him changed. The stars got dispursed by the appearance of jeering face of a ninja with the Sound-village forehead protector. The man was slowly lifting up a katana. Suddenly the memory hit Iruka. He got hit by the Thunder Clap! He must have been out for only a few seconds.

Inwardly he groaned 'Nooooooooo... Move, damn it, move!' His body felt like it was filled with lead. His limbs shuddered as he tried to force them into obedience. He couldn't tear his eyes away from katana which was now aiming at his heart. 'At least I'll be dying alone... No-one's going to suffer because of my death.'

"Don't you fucking dare..." Iruka heard a growl from somewhere out of his sight. Next thing, a furry blur whooshed above him and attached itself to the ninja's neck, who staggered back and fell ungracefully onto the ground. Loud snarling and much screaming followed.

Another furry face made an appearance in front of Iruka's face. "Hey kid, are you all right?" gruffly said the dog, bits of drool flying. Iruka wondered if he has died and was now experiencing the afterlife. Somehow he imagined it different.

"Bro, you better take a look at him. He's not looking too good." spoke the dog again. Next, furry face was replaced by a familiar face framed with a silver shock of hair. 'That's more like it' thought Iruka. 'I always hoped I'd go to heaven'. "Hello Kashi-kun, my love " Iruka whispered dreamily. "I guess old man Sarutobi is around here somewhere too..."

The smile changed to a frown. "Iruka-kun, did you knock your head? Not a good place to be lying down for a nap." A gentle hand gingerly moved around Iruka's scalp and came up covered in blood. The frown changed to glare, directed at the Sound ninja who was still scrabbling in amogst the dogs. The sensation of someone touching him started to bring back feeling to Iruka's body. "Aaaaaaaaargh" Iruka grimaced. His bruised ribs screamed at him, a wound in his shoulder was a black hole of burning pain, his head was threatening to split, and the rest of his body was aching. Yep, he was very much alive. Even though right now he wished he wasn't.

"Kakashi?" He stared up at the pale face, suddenly noticing how exhausted the copy-nin looked. And noticing that the mask was off! Not that he could tell what Kakashi looked like because the entire lower half of his face was covered with dried blood and grime, doing as good a job as his usual mask.

"Welcome back" Kakashi smiled again, tired face aglow with relief. "Can you sit up?" Threading his arm under younger man's neck, Kakashi carefully helped Iruka lean forward. Iruka tried to resist the desire to overwhelm his friend with questions about his mission, or to throw himself around Kakashi's neck and tell him how much he missed him, was worried about him, wanted to punch him for making him worry, kiss him for coming back in one piece... Instead he croaked "You look just like I feel! Lets get the hell out of there."

"That might pose up a bit of a problem" Kakashi grinned wider. "I'm afraid I'm all spent... Our friends over here" Kakashi waved his hand at the pack of snarling dogs guarding the motionless Sound nin."...took the last of my chakra. Was on my way back... didn't think I could help... on my own... so I summoned..." Kakashi swallowed and wavered. Iruka quickly took over the role of support.

"Your mission... Did you accomplish it? Did you get the scroll?"

Kakashi nodded "In my vest." He was getting more and more limp by a second. Iruka was taking more and more of his weight. "Take it... And go." Iruka gasped "I'm not leaving you!"

"The mission is more important... than what you want" Kakashi continued in a hoarse whisper "I'm just glad that... I made it back... To see you... safe." Kakashi's head fell on Iruka's shoulder. Iruka thought he heard a grumble about some elephants. Huh?

"Oh no you don't!" Iruka said."Not before you tell me what was in that note!"

Gently lowering his unconscious friend to the ground, Iruka got himself up. Kakashi looked small and frail, curled up on the carpt of muddy grass. Somehow Iruka will need to get them two back to the village. Hopefully without getting stabbed in the back.

"Pakkun, how long will you be able to keep these bastards here?" Iruka asked.

"Long enough for you to take Brother to the safe place" replied the nin-dog. "But you better get moving fast."

"That's fine... And thank you." Stretching out his limbs, Iruka assesed his state. His legs felt a bit shaky from the sound shock but that will soon pass. The wound in his upper arm was superficial even if it did hurt like hell; at least the bleeding has stopped. His shoulder was much worse - his right arm was not going to be of much use though. Iruka walked up and crouched by the body of his young comrade. Not a sign of life was left in him, not a drop of chakra. Iruka felt his heart turning into stone. For now he will have to leave him behind and take care of the living.

Coming to the still nin, Iruka stooped up and got his arms under Kakashi's. Gritting his teeth, trying to to jar the unconscious man too much, he pulled him up onto himself. Kakashi has risked his mission to stop and help Iruka, at the cost of his own life. Iruka held the limp figure closer. "I will get you back... I will keep you safe."

Hoisting Kakashi onto his left shoulder and trying to ignore the pain, Iruka started off towards home.

* * *

_Since its only yesterday that I have discovered that there is such thing as Betas... I hope you realise that all this work so far is un-Beta-ed and coming straight out of my head. Gah, will know to find Beta for the next one._

_Well, what do you think? Please review :)_


	7. Almost there

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the mentioned characters or places.

**Warning:** A hint of yaoi.

_AN: Sorry for taking so long with this chapter, I had a severe creative block. Also, this chapter is not a terribly exciting one, but it places the background for the next one, which fluff-lovers should appreciate! Enjoy :)_

**Summary:** So they've made it…

* * *

Sitting outside the medic tent, Iruka was taking in the first morning light. Timid gray-blue glow was filling out behind the murky swirls of the gloomy night sky. It seemed that this night has lasted forever, like whole of the last week was wrapped into the heavy fog of waiting, not-thinking and living by the survival instinct. With the diminishing darkness Iruka felt a weight starting to lift off him.

About two hours ago, he was shuffling his feet, concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other, getting closer to home. His exhausted mind completely involved in the simple task of not stopping, he hasn't even realised that he made it until he felt someone try and take the precious weight off his shoulder.

Some animalistic defence mechanism has fired and Iruka found himself looking at several Konoha guards and medic nin. Over the sharp edge of a kunai, clutched in his own hand. Snapping out, Iruka, muttered something apologetically, lowered his hands and let Kakashi be taken off him.

He didn't even know if the jounin was alive… At least he hasn't moved during the slow trip. Iruka felt numb. Staggering, he was escorted through the gates and into the medic tent where he was impersonally stripped, chakra-scanned, had bits of metal extracted, bandaged and dressed, wrapped in a blanket, and put onto a waiting bench. Some kind person put a cup of something warm into his bandaged hands.

Behind the drawn curtain he could see a flurry of activity around the still body of his friend. One of the medics has rushed out clutching a stained scroll in his hands. Stiffly Iruka got up and left the tent.

For the next while Iruka was sitting outside, staring out to the east, huddling the blankets against chilly air. As his body got used to stillness and the world around started to gain colour, Iruka felt himself touch the surface of normality. Medics were obviously still busy in the tent, which meant that Kakashi was alive, and everything is going to be well. Everything will be well.

Hearing a familiar voice eminating from the tent, Iruka stood up to find himself face-to-face with one of the elders. Soft old hands put themselves around Iruka's shoulders.

"Sit down, sit down lad" said the old woman. "You really should go home now and have some rest!"

"Arigatou gozaimas" bowed Iruka. "I will shortly, but first I'd like to make sure that Kakashi-san is going to be all-right."

"Is he a good friend of yours then?" motherly smiled creased wrinkly face further. "Such a caring young man you are!" Iruka blushed.

"Well, if that is the case," she continued "then you can do something for your friend too. Kakashi-san's injuries would normally not be considered serious, if it wasn't for his chakra being so badly depleted. What possessed him to wring himself out so much so close to the village!" Old woman shook her head.

"He did it to save me," murmured Iruka.

"I see… Well, to help his body restore his chakra reserves, Kakashi-san was put into a short-term coma. No need to worry, Iruka-sensei, its nothing but a deep sleep and it will run out by tonight. By then Kakashi-san should be up and about.

"But until then, Kakashi-san should be taken to his apartment. What I want you to do, Iruka-san, is to stay with him until he wakes up, and make sure that he drinks plenty and takes some vitamins. Can you do that for me?"

"Of course, " nodded Iruka. "It will be an honour."

"Good lad. And make sure you get some sleep yourself." The old lady smiled and left.

Within the next minutes, Iruka was called in inside the tent and led to sleeping Kakashi, who was wrapped into a fluffy cocoon of white medical blankets.

"You will have to carry Kakashi-san, as we are currently short of assistants, "said the medic nin apologetically. "But I will teleport you to the apartment, so at least you will not have to walk far." The cocoon was lifted and placed carefully into Iruka's hands. The sensei ground his teeth as the weight pressed on his bandages. Still, the limp shape felt light.

"Please stay close by for the jutsu," instructed a medic nin, performing the necessary handseals. A loud clap and smoke followed caused by the displacement.

Squinting through the clearing smoke, Iruka staggered disorientated. In the light of dawn, the jounin apartment street looked deceivingly barren. Locating the correct door, Iruka shuffled to it and heaved with his shoulder to get it open.

For a second, Iruka frose as he saw himself standing there, at the entrance to Kakashi's home, with his beloved wrapped in white lying in his hands… If it wasn't for the circumstances, this picture could have been comical… or maybe romantic… or maybe he should hurry up and get in before anyone sees them and gets an excuse to tease him for the rest of his life!

Walking into the dark corridor, Iruka peered around trying to locate the bedroom. To the left he could see a couch and a coffee table. Moving further along the corridor, Iruka stuck a nose around the doorways until he found the room he was looking for.

Carefully bending over above the unmade bed, Iruka put down his precious burden. Supporting his aching back he straightened, stretched and looked around.

'Somehow I didn't imagine my first visit here to be like this' he thought to himself. Jounin apartments were not much bigger than chuunin, but the room seemed large without being crowded by unnecessary furniture. A wardrobe in the corner, a set of shelves against a wall, a chair with a vest thrown over it…

The tidiness of the room was unexpected, and a bit disconcerting, showing another side of Kakashi. As if his tardiness was just a pretence. 'Of course its only a game' chided himself Iruka. 'Kakashi-san is one of the best shinobi in the village, he wouldn't be there if his silly habits were for real.'

Morning light was slowly creeping into the room, revealing blues and greens of the room furnishings. A deep breath escaped from the lips of the still shape on the bed.

'I should make him more comfortable…'

Iruka sat on the edge and gently pushed off the blankets wrapping his friend. As the layers came off bare body became displayed, creeping morning light emphasising the contrast between grime and snow-white bandages.

Iruka went to the kitchen, found a clean rug and filled up a bowl with warm water and a touch of vinegar. Putting it on the bed-side table, he wet the cloth and wrung it out…

* * *

_AN: I know, a funny place to stop, but it was getting long and late, and poor Alice was nodding off. TBC!_


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